Have you heard about the proven power of kindness? In our western world, the relentless pursuit of high self-esteem has become ubiquitous. Our culture tells us that we need to be exceptional in everything we do in order to feel worthy. We try like crazy to be the smartest or the most talented person in the room (sound familiar?) so we can feel good about ourselves, so that we deserve to feel good about ourselves. But what happens when we bump into someone more attractive, smarter, more successful than we are? What happens when we fail? That hard-earned self-esteem evaporates, and we are left feeling “less than,” unworthy. We discover that self-esteem is not a reliable way to relate to ourselves, because it abandons us when we aren’t winning.
Luckily, there’s an alternative to self-esteem that many researchers believe provides a path to true happiness: self-compassion. Self-compassion is an attitude and practice of kindness (not self-pity!) that offers us a non-judgmental, non-evaluative way to relate to ourselves whether we’re winning or losing, whether we’re the smartest person in the room or just a person in a room. Self-compassion can teach us how to befriend ourselves just as we are, 100% of the time, just like we would do for a good friend.
You can learn to be motivated by kindness instead of criticism, to be healthier and happier and a true refuge for yourself. If you want to learn more about it, come to the IFG Self-Compassion Workshop facilitated by Susan and Joe on Wednesday, Oct. 16 at 19:00 in the Aula Marielle Franco.
Hope to see you there!